February 2011
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"TOUCH ME AND I'LL PUNCH YOU IN YOUR FACE"
My friends decided at dinner tonight that I need to have a shirt with that written on it. I receive so many unsolicited hugs. So many. I apparently look like I need a hug. I don’t know but it needs to stop.
Alternate shirt: “Touch me and I’ll fuck you up.”
I also need one that says “I was born awkward.” I feel like I’ll have a lot less explaining to do...
January 2011
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I realize a lot of my anecdotes involve some...
One time my mom put my car seat in the car but forgot to actually strap the seat in. So of course I fell over. She paid my brother $10 not to tell my dad.
There’s also the time my best friend’s mom left us alone at her house while she went out to get cigarettes. We were probably about six or seven. We turned on the tv as soon as she left. It was on HBO and Children of the Corn was...
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Instead of having people leave hearts or symbols...
Why not?
When I was five, my brother was babysitting me and he was tired of it (and me). So he packed my suitcase full of my clothes, walked me out to the front porch, sat me down and told me that my real parents would come and pick me up.
Also when I was five, we were on vacation at the beach and there was this little theater that showed random kids movies for really cheap on weeknights. My dad...
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firebolting replied to your post:I kind of like being on Team Long Shot for this year’s Oscars.
TEAM PIPER PERABO!!!!!
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I kind of like being on Team Long Shot for this...
Team Long Shot, for me, encompasses Toy Story 3 and 127 Hours.
Much less stress knowing there’s no chance they’ll win. It’s disappointing, but these two movies generate much less negativity and fewer hurt feelings.
Still sucks neither of them have a chance though.
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Also. This whole fucking thing
jesusbale:
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Anonymous asked: why do you call him jon elizabeth hamm? i find both him and the nickname wonderful but i'm just curious.
also WHOA I JUST GOT DISTRACTED. betty white? how odd.
also WHOA I JUST GOT DISTRACTED. betty white? how odd.
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JAMES FRANCO AND HIS SHADES
CAN GET IT.
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Can we talk again about how Gnomeo and Juliet is...
And not some sort of elaborate prank that Hollywood is pulling.
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SARAH PLAIN YOU'RE THE HOTTEST MILF IN THE WORLD!
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You watch movies during the day. You matrix bullet...
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rufustfirefly asked: http://popculturebrain.com/post/3014976271/breaking-henry-cavill-has-been-cast-as-superman
THERE GOES OUR DREAM
THERE GOES OUR DREAM
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yellowisms asked: SOMEBODY BRING US ALL THE HAAAAAAAM
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I HOPE REALLY BONKERS SHIT GOES DOWN AT THE OSCARS
arbitrarily:
LIKE, SURPRISE, MOTHERFUCKERS!
JAMES FRANCO FOR BEST ACTOR!
TOY STORY 3 FOR BEST PICTURE!
JENNIFER LAWRENCE FOR BEST ACTRESS!
JACKI WEAVER FOR BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS!
GUY MOUSTACHE WRITE-IN FOR BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR!
AND WE’RE ALL WOW I DIDN’T SEE ANY OF THIS COMING THIS IS AMAAAAAZING!
GANG WARS WILL ERUPT ON TUMBLR
AND NO ONE WILL KNOW WHICH SIDE TO CHOOSE
BECAUSE...
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blushingscarlett asked: If loving images of Jon Hamm's head Photoshop on to other people's bodies is wrong, I don't want to right.
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Remember when I used to be normal and not photoshop Jon Hamm’s head onto other bodies?
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annhog asked: You are the Big Headed Hamm to my Frosty the SnowHamm